I've moved!

I have moved into my own place! I haven't had a chance to unpack everything so I don't have pictures yet, but I will get around to it someday. The best part about moving is that I'm only 5 minutes from work. The worst part is waiting for maintenance when things break, especially on weekends. This weekend my shower broke so I'm already back at my parent's house until tomorrow evening. Thankful I have somewhere to go though when things like that happen. Once I get all settled I think I'll blog more regularly.....I hope.

Adoption Day!

Today is adoption day *grin*

22 years ago I became a part of this amazing family and I couldn't be more blessed or grateful.

A Simpler Life

Getting away from it all always puts things in perspective. The simplistic nature of the Amish buggies I see going down the street remind me of how my life has turned into chaos and noise. Coming to Shipshewana I always find myself wondering what life would be like if I were Amish, if Sundays were truly set aside to be days of rest and you spent a good portion of the day worshiping God (Amish church services last at least two hours if not more). But then I think of how much I depend on technology, electricity and all those other wonderful things to function normally and I always tell myself "these are essential" but are they really? I'm reflecting during my time here at Shipshewana and realizing that the days I don't get on facebook are happy and full the majority of the time and I find myself deep in thought about my relationship with God or other things that are truly essential to survival. My main hope is that this time away from the normal life routine and the reminder that life doesn't have to always be "go go go" to be full and happy doesn't get pushed aside as soon as I get back into Michigan where all my adult responsibilities sit waiting for me to return.

Labor day is exactly what it's supposed to be this year...a break from labor and I am so grateful. Thank you God!

Rise

This song has been such a blessing in my life in the past few weeks and the lyrics speak to me everyday so I thought I would share them

Yes I will rise
Out of these ashes rise
From this trouble I have found
And this rubble on the ground
I will rise

Yes I will rise
Out of these ashes rise
From this trouble I have found
And this rubble on the ground
I will rise
Cause He Who is in me
Is greater than I will ever be
And I will rise

Sometimes my heart is on the ground
And hope is nowhere to be found
Love is a figment I once knew
And yet I hold on to what I know is true

Yes I will rise
Out of these ashes rise
From this trouble I have found
And this rubble on the ground
I will rise
Cause He Who is in me
Is greater than I will ever be
And I will rise

Well I keep on coming to this place
That I don't know quite how to face
So I lay down my life in hopes to die
That somehow I might rise

Yes I will rise
Out of these ashes rise
From this trouble I have found
And this rubble on the ground
I will rise
Cause He Who is in me
Is greater than I will ever be
And I will rise

I know I'm Pretty but I want to be Beautiful

People say that I'm pretty but I can never get past the "pretty" stage. I take their compliments in stride and I'm glad that at least I get compliments but inside I'm kicking myself wondering "when will someone call me beautiful, what am I doing wrong that I can't be found beautiful?" People see me as put together and efficient yet on the inside I feel broken. I can't get any guy to see me as something other than cute and I wonder if I will ever be considered a woman rather than a girl. I keep saying "God is Enough" but if I am honest with myself and ask "am I really believing it right now?", the answer is no. I feel so alone I thing that no guy is ever going to love me and want me to be his wife. I admit I'm not good at flirting or dropping hints that I like someone for that matter, and I'm not one to go out at night just to find someone, but I try and yet I get the "oh I just like you as a friend are you ok with that? and while I say yes I see now that all this time I've been lying, many times the guys I've felt something for find someone else and marry and every time I see them it hurts but I don't let on because if I lose their friendship I'm more alone and I don't want that to happen. Every night the tears threaten to come as I think about the fact that I'm still alone (living with my parents gives me too much time to think) and I wake up thinking it's a new day and I can meet someone and yet every night I still go to bed alone (figuratively not literally for those of you whose minds work in funny ways...). I feel like I'm at the end of my rope and I'm just going to have accept that I'm not meant to meet anyone, but I know I shouldn't think like that it's irrational and silly but it's what I feel and I'm sick of telling people that I like being single. I guess all this to say that I need a lot of prayer right now as I try to accept life and begin to trust God that he will bring Mr. Right along at the right tim or that he shows me that I'm meant to be single.

Sorry to be such a downer, if you stayed with me this long then I am grateful, thanks for reading.

More things that make me naturally happy

I have a GAP obsession, I absolutely love going into the store and seeing all the new fashions (whether they look good on me or not). I don't spend a lot of money in the store, but I don't need to, I love going into the store just to browse. Plus I remember things that I like and then look for them at the outlet a few months later because they are usually a lot cheaper.

Caramel Apple Spice Cider from starbucks, the smell gets my mouth watering and that first sip is like heaven on earth. If I could have one of these everyday without it costing me a lot of money I would for sure.

It's Official: Adult life has truly begun

It's official I'm an adult. I started my first true "grown up" job on July 7th, 2011. I work 40 hours 5 days a week and what grown up job wouldn't be official if it didn't have a commute (1 hour 15 minute one way just in case you were wondering). As a result of my grown up job I have come to appreciate my weekends (though this is only my second weekend). There's so much I have to get used to now that I have a stable job and my mind gets so wrapped up in trying to remember every piece of information I'm being taught at work that weekends are the time to let my brain take a vacation. My friend Amy is doing a blog called Friday Highs, that talks about the things in life that we truly love and give us those natural highs and that we take for granted many times. Now that I'm working all the time it's hard for me to stop and smell the roses I guess you could say. Therefore, I'm going to do a similar blog to hers that helps me keep track of the things that give me that natural high and that I take for granted. Here is my first of many things that I appreciate but take for granted:

The way my face feels after washing it at night. It's just a cool refreshing feeling that I love.

Currently I am using Burt's Bees Deep Cleansing Cream with Soap Bark and Chamomile and it's amazing. I'm also using a 5 minute warming mineral mask from the Body shop when I feel the need to have a spa like facial.

Home Sweet Home???

I drove back into the mitten state on Monday with mixed feelings. Most of my friends and family still say "hey you're home" but I don't know if I feel the same way. On one hand I'm enjoying being back where I grew up, I get the chance to go to family graduation parties, attend our annual father's day picnic (though it is a week late). But, part of me misses being in a state where I can just be me. I feel like I have to conform to be the person I used to be because that's what people here remember and it's exhausting to try and get them to realize I've changed and have grown into the true me. Plus, my parents have gotten used to living without me and I without them, so it's a lot of learning and compromising trying to figure out how to fit into each other's lives and routines. Am I really home? I guess I don't know the answer just yet, I still feel like I'm on vacation and that any day now I'll be driving back to North Carolina or even Chicago and establishing my home base there.

Things I like about Michigan:

Yummy Breadsticks and Italian food from our local restaurant

The Fenton House

Yes I know it's like walmart, but they have the best prices, and it's just so much better than walmart, target or some of the other grocery store/box stores out there.

My niece Molly!!!!!

Kindle Magic

I've always been an avid reader, from the days when I used to say to my mom "read books to you mommy" (although she always ended up reading them to me) to the days when I couldn't put down the teen christian series Clearwater Crossing, and now picking up my Kindle any chance I get and reading the e-books I've bought and the ones that are free (there are actually A LOT of good ones for free!). But I'll admit I was skeptical of the Kindle at first. I've been asking for an e-reader for about 2 years now, for Christmas, Birthdays etc. not really knowing what they were just knowing that they were popular and I thought it would be cool though I didn't realize how much I would use it. As they've gotten more popular and common in society I've still wanted one though I began to wonder would I miss the physical action of turning the page or being able to skip to the end and read the ending before the rest of the book? Plus, I kind of forgot that I wanted one, it lost the "I need it now" factor and I realized I would be ok without one. Graduation from grad school rolled around and I wasn't expecting much in the way of gifts, I didn't need anything (besides money). My mom thought otherwise and bought me a Nook, but said that I could return it and buy a Kindle. Being the tech geek that I am I decided to do days of research before I decided whether I wanted to keep the Nook or return it and get a Kindle. On almost every tech site and review that I read the Kindle won out over the Nook so I made the decision to buy the Kindle and I am not sorry. The Kindle has this magic to it where you almost don't realize you are reading an e-book and you feel like you're reading a regular paperback or hardcover. On top of that I just can't seem to put the books down, I get so engrossed and love reading even more today than I did when I was little. So if you're looking for a good way to get back into reading and start looking into e-readers I highly recommend the Kindle, maybe it can bring a little bit of magic into your life and renew the spark to read or light the fire if you've never enjoyed reading.

Sorry I'm venting for a moment

I hate when the feeling of loneliness creeps back into my life just when I thought I let it go. Sometimes I don't realize it until late at night when I'm lying awake unable o sleep. Other times I notice it throughout the day if I'm at a restaurant and see a lot of couples or if I turn on the TV and their are movies on about love and relationships. The worst part is I can't stop watching, in fact I end up watching more movies about love and happiness because it gives me that reassurance or at least a glimmer of hope that it will happen for me someday. I feel like I'm ready for that stage in life, the honeymoon period where everything is new and we just can't be away from each other too long, and then the phase where we know that we are meant for each other and we're just comfortable, and then the marriage where you are bound forever and get to work as a team through life. It's not easy that I know and some people may ask why I'm wishing my single days away but you have to understand that everyone around me is getting married, my brothers, my former roommates, and just friends in general. Don't get me wrong I'm happy for them and I love weddings but there are times I feel like I'm at the breaking point. I've never had a guy make me feel special, never really been on a date, never been kissed the list goes on I pray to God that he will help me be patient and learn that I can be completely satisfied being single, but it's definitely taking time and days like today I'm ready to just throw up my hands in frustration. But I know God will get me through days like today, and I'm a tough cookie. So to anyone that reads my blog I apologize for venting I just needed to get this off my chest and now I'll go back to being happy :)

Chinese and General Tso Chicken

I didn't grow up eating chinese food and I always used to envy those people I saw having chinese take-out from those awesome boxes with chopsticks. There were chinese restaurants around our town but it just wasn't a food that my parents grew up eating so it was never an option when deciding what to have for dinner each night. We had PF Changs once but my mom wasn't too impressed and I was such a picky eater when I was young that I refused to try anything on the menu besides the great wall of chocolate. Fast forward to high school when the chinese buffet came into my life. I will still pretty safe when it came to eating foods at the buffet (translation: pretty much any food I ate at the buffet could be found at most restaurants and wasn't specific to a chinese buffet). But the idea of Chinese food was suddenly on the radar and we went for the Chinese buffet every now and then. However, when I went to college the idea of Chinese food never entered my mind except for the one time someone asked me to go to Panda Express which had just opened not too far from campus and I said no.

Now let's move on to today well just a few weeks ago. I was at my brother's house looking for leftovers to eat for dinner and he took out the coveted chinese take out box I had always envied. Curious I asked what it was and he said General Tso's chicken, and of course I not knowing anything about chinese food proceeded to say "is that a restaurant?" He laughed and made fun of me a little (he can never pass up an opportunity to tease me) but then told me it was actually a chicken dish you can get at a lot of chinese restaurants. I'm more adventurous when it comes to eating and trying new foods now so I decided to try a piece of General Tso's even though my brother said it was spicy, when I popped that piece of chicken in my mouth it felt like a little piece of heaven. Just the right amount of spicy, a little sweet, and a little sour. There wasn't much left so I didn't really get another piece but my mouth and brain filed General Tso's chicken into an acceptable dish to eat.

Today I had a craving for Chinese for the first time and decided to go order Chinese take out at a restaurant in Hillsborough called China Fuji. I'm glad I knew what I wanted at least for my main dish because the menu was overwhelming, and since I had the choice of a side (egg roll, wonton soup, egg drop soup) I chose Wonton soup hoping it would be another slice of heaven in my mouth. I got home, and opened the paper sack that my food was contained in and was disappointed that I didn't get the Chinese take-out box but quickly put the thought aside and opened up General Tso's chicken and put it in my mouth and it was still as good as I remembered.The wonton soup was not such a hit, I wasn't a fan of the dumplings but I can try egg drop soup next time.

So that's my Chinese food story, I'm quite excited if you can't already tell that I can finally say that I like Chinese and if someone asks me to go out for Chinese I can say yes and really mean it. I'm sure most of you who had Chinese growing up think this really weird but hey it was enough to brighten my otherwise monotonous week.

So I Got Hooded

Well it's been an eventful few weeks. I finished classes, wrote my final papers, annotated my last case studies, dog sat for a friend for a few days, got into a minor car accident, welcomed my family into town oh yeah and I got hooded! I am officially Brittany Anderson, MSW (master of social work for those of you that don't know that acronym stands for).

It's a weird feeling knowing that school will no longer be the focus of my life and that I will be considered a professional from now on rather than a student. I've basically been focused on school since I was 2. I've been preparing for this time in my life, the time when I will begin my first real world job (No I don't consider my fast food jobs real world jobs to be honest) and really start establishing my own life which includes putting the majority of my money into bills rather than going to the movies or doing other fun things (not that I haven't done that in the past but I'm sure you catch my drift).

I haven't found a job but God is faithful and I'm putting all my trust in him because he has never failed me and I know he won't fail me now. But, I'll admit that the anxiety that comes with not knowing what's going to come next and worrying about money is overwhelming and it's satan's way of trying to get me to give into temptation and move back home or work at Wendy's (Wendy's is just not a good environment for me and I see now that I was turning my back on God during those days because I just wanted to fit in with the staff and that's not good for my personal, professional, or spiritual life). So I'm fulfilling my life with things that are pleasing to God including reading, listening to music, and even when I'm applying for jobs I always pray that God will show me if this is a job that I should pursue.

So that's pretty much my life right now. I've spent this week after graduation savoring the moment and let it sink in because it's still hard to believe that I have my masters degree and it deserves to be celebrated because no one ever thought I could make it this far and it's been great to overcome such a huge obstacle and overcome it well (I got high passes in 9 out of 10 of my classes!).

Now here are some pictures from this past weekend for you to enjoy

My brother Tim and I :)

(sorry don't know how to flip the photo)

The original Anderson Clan

Just one of the many pictures with friends.

The friend in this photo is Kim she is from Jamaica and she is amazing.

We survived the summer by talking about the musical RENT

We even went to see RENT on stage in Raleigh.

My brother Josh (he also lives in North Carolina now)

More pictures may be posted at a later date if I decide that I want to share more.

Pomeranian Dogs

Note to self: Don't look at pomeranian dogs on petfinder.com when A. you have no money and B. you live in a house that doesn't allow pets. I will throw a huge party the day that I get a place that allows pets and have the money to pay for pet insurance and all that good stuff. Until then won't you please marvel with me at the awesomeness of the pomeranian

The end....

I am now officially done with school. All of my classes are finished, my internship is over, and all homework is complete. And while I'm so excited it's also a weird feeling to know that in a few short weeks it is possible that I'll be starting my first true grown up job in a field that I love. I worked so hard to get to this moment and of course there were times that I thought it would never end and now that it has part of me wants torewind. I love being in school, I love having the opportunity to learn and practice my skills with a group of people who are also still learning, and I love the feeling I get when I turn in an assignment that I know I did a good job on.

But instead of dwelling on the past and wishing I could go back, I am just enjoying this time of relaxation and preparing for the real world, case in point I enjoyed a piece of this awesome cheesecake last Friday as an early celebration for finishing school and to help get me

through the last week of school, it was delicious. I hig

hly recommend going to the Cheesecake Factory and ordering the 30th anniversary chocolate cake cheesecake if you haven't tried it already!

Thanks to you all for supporting me in this grad school journey, I couldn't have done it without your support and love. More to come as I begin the next chapter of my life so be on the lookout!

Been off the grid

Oh goodness I haven't posted in quite some time. I'm still alive if anyone was worrying about that...but I've stayed off the grid mostly due to the fact that I'm trying to find a job and finish school etc. Hopefully in the near future I'll have some exciting news that I have been hired. Until then I probably will be off the grid....cross your fingers and say a prayer!

The City Harmonic - Manifesto (OFFICIAL)

Heard this song on K-Love today and fell in love with it. The City Harmonics are quickly rising on my favorite artist list!!!

Music Challenge

I like listening to the radio, for some reason I find the radio a lot more enjoyable at times than just listening to cd's or my ipod. Recently I've been listening to only Christian music, and have all the radios that I use (mostly just my car, and radio in my bathroom) set to K-Love. Every morning as I'm getting ready for work or school I find myself excited to turn on the radio and listen to some good Christian music as a way to get my day started off right. On top of that K-Love shares awesome stories of ministry from churches all over the world as a part of there morning news segment, and I love that they are trying to focus on some good things happening in the world because our news stations are so negatively focused these days. Anyway, I've found that just listening to Christian music has had a huge impact on my life, even though it seems so insignificant Here are some awesome things I've noticed

1. I'm singing Christian lyrics throughout my day and a lot of the lyrics are great reminders that I need to always be aware of what I say and how I act, and that God is always with me when I start to feel lonely or empty.

2. I get through my days with a lot more happiness. Before, I looked at a lot of my days and dreaded them before they even began because I would be gone 12+ hours straight. By the time those days ended I would be so unhappy that I didn't feel like talking, or even trying to act happy. Now, even though those days are still long, I'm smiling at the end of them and I've engaged in a lot of meaningful conversations with some unlikely people including a fellow social work student from China, and 2 men who knew very little English but wanted to know why Americans don't ask "how do you do" very much (because in their country they were told to always ask other people "how do you do"). It seems like a simple conversation but by the end I could just feel that i had made their day because I think a lot of times people just ignore them since they don't speak very good English and it's hard to understand if you don't take the time to listen.

3. My desire to listen to other music that does not Glorify God has gone down quite a bit. There are those few songs I still like to listen to (mostly Etta James, and Rascal Flatts) but I try to limit it as much as possible because I realized it was infiltrating my life and making me act and say things that were contradicting to my faith and walk with Christ.

So friends, I'd like to challenge you, try listening to only Christian Music (doesn't matter if it's on cd's, ipod, and the radio) for 10 days, and see how your life changes.

In the words of Jaci Valesquez (OLD SCHOOL!!!): We can make a difference, we can make a change, we can make the world a better place.

No Mo Chemo

A lot of people think it's weird that I love to work with kids who have cancer, and there are days I think I'm crazy too...trust me it's never fun to see how toxic chemo takes a toll on the body in such a short amount of time. And then there's days like I had today, where you get to tell a 6 year old "No Mo Chemo" the look on their face makes everything worth it. Days get even better when patients come back just to say hello, and they are successfully in remission you realize that it's not all sad and gloomy.

There are several things you can do to help support kids with chronic illnesses and one is non profit and takes just some time volunteering to help make blankets (Kylee they would love you if you sewed a blanket or two). The blankets are a part of Project Linus and there are chapters all over the nation. I've been thinking for my birthday this year that instead of presents I'd love for people to donate money or time to Project Linus, make a wish, or the National Children's Cancer society because they need all the volunteers, prayers, and donations they can get. Here is the link to project linus, please take some time to read about it and if you can, get involved!
projectlinus.org

Gravity

My friend Kylee's post got me thinking about good songs, and for some reason the song "Gravity" by Shawn McDonald has played on pandora twice tonight, and the lyrics seem fit life perfectly. As a christian, I always want to be close to God and keep him at the center of my life, but the gravity of "life" pulls me down and makes me cry a lot because sadness seems to be so prominent in today's culture and while sadness is a good thing, as Christians we have to remember that sadness is temporary if we are Christians because someday we will be eternally happy with Jesus Christ.

The ways of this world are grabbing a hold
Won't let me go, won't let me fly by
It’s taking it's toll down on my soul
‘Cause I know what I need in my life
Don't let me lose my sight of You
Don't let me lose my sight

Chorus:
I don't want to fall away from You
Gravity is pulling me on down
I don't want to fall away from You
Gravity is pulling me to the ground

This world keeps making me cry
But I'm going to try, going to try to fly, gotta fly high
Don't want to give into the sin, want to stay in you ‘til the end
Don't want to lose my sight of You
Don't want to lose my sight

Chorus

I want to fly
Into the sky
Turn my back on this whole world and
Leave it all behind
This place is not my home
It's got nothing for me
Only leaves me with emptiness
And tears in my eyes

Chorus

Being a social worker, and job hunting

Social work gets a bad reputation no doubt. We are called "baby snatchers" and many other mean names I dare not mention on this blog. People who aren't in the profession don't understand that social work is centered around love and connecting people to one another through resources. The picture above represents the true meaning of social work, its' about love and connection and putting smiles on everyone from babies to senior citizens. Most times we don't get recognized and that's ok, we knew it was going to happen. But if you know a social worker tell them thank you for all the work they do. It's likely that they are overworked, underpaid, and stressed to the max due to their workload, yet they continue to do the job because it's what they love.

I'm beginning the job hunt and application process and I am lucky to have picked an area of the social work profession that is growing. There are many job opportunities out there in states and cities that I love and could imagine living in. But becoming an adult I've realized that taking a job has strings attached. You have to pack, move, find a place to live, learn your way around a new city, become involved in the community, establish yourself as a resident at the post-office and a whole host of other places including websites, the bank, and the DMV. At the same time the time to relocate is now. When I don't have a husband, or kids to think about. I'd love to stay in NC for a few years but I can't limit myself and in some sense i'm ready to move on. I thought NC was the place I could see myself living but it's almost like it was just meant to be this chapter in my life. The bridge to grad school and then grad school itself. Once i graduate that chapter will be closed and NC won't have the same appeal or opportunities that I have been blessed with for the past two years. So I've broadened my horizons. I'm looking for jobs in any state (well besides Alaska, and Hawaii). This is my one chance to live life. If it means moving to Texas I'm for it. If it means moving back to Michigan I'll be ok with that too (it's of course not my first choice) because it means it's God's will for my life and I want t follow his will.

I am hoping that those who read this will begin to think of social work in a new light, and if you feel so inclined lifting me up in prayer as I begin the job hunt. It's rough in this economy but I know God will provide and I'd love it if you would join me in praying that he provides and shows me the next step in on my journey through life.

2011

Happy New Year All! I'm back from cold Michigan and watching the Capital One Bowl game. I hope everyone had a safe and happy Holiday season. 2011 has a lot in store for me this year I can feel it...and I hope a great job is one of the things in store because I graduate and want to do what i love. I hope reunite with friends this year as well that's a huge goal of mine, so I hope i see a ton of you this year whether it's on a vacation or at a wedding.

HAPPY 2011